When I Blew It!

I’m patient as long as what I want is happening.  But let my schedule or plan get discombobulated and I can become a bear… a poppa bear… a hungry poppa bear woken up from a nap.

Pam, Amy, Britton, and I went to Nashville last week to see Trey play basketball.  I met P, A, & B (Shorthand for family names) in Athens.  They were ahead of schedule!  We had plenty of time to get to the gym for warm-ups before the game.  So I settled back for a leisurely ride.  THEN four things happened and I went from a smoldering ember to a raging fire (I relate this to my embarrassment).

ASIDE: I relate this to my embarrassment for a few reasons.  1) To remind us all that we have to constantly be on our guard.   2) It doesn’t take much for us to stumble.  3) None of us are beyond simple things causing us to fail.  4) Our failures are against God {Worst of all}.  5) Our failures wound others (That hurts a lot).

Back to the five things.   Amy’s order wasn’t in the sack I got from Chic-Filet (I got jipped!).  Second… Now we’d have to stop… AGAIN.  Third… the exit we took required a several mile drive into a podunk town for food.  Fourth… Outside Brentwood, TN traffic came to a standstill.  Fifth… I started looking at my watch (Big mistake).

To top it all off P, A, & B were cutting up, laughing, and having a good ole time (While I steamed).  With each minute I got more and more frustrated.  We’d miss warm ups.  Then… we’d miss tip-off.  Then… we’d miss who knows how much of the game.  Then… we’ll might miss the whole game!  That’s when it happened.  That’s when I blew it.

One of my family asked me a simple, innocuous question.  I answered in a low grumble.  In an attempt to lighten my mood their reply was funny.  And that’s when I made a comment under my breath.  Note to self: When you can’t hear well… what you think is a whisper is to other people normal conversation.  They heard what I said and it shut them down.  The hilarity was gone.  The kidding was over.  The laughter was silenced.  BECAUSE OF ME.

Immediately I knew: 1) I’d failed God miserably.  2) I had wounded three people I love dearly.  3) Guilt flooded my spirit.  4) Satan and his demons were laughing at me.  I felt a little of the sting Peter must have felt after denying Christ (just a little).

I did what I could to make things right (Repented to all three & a plus factor)… but damage was done.  And it grieved me deeply.  I have been having to do battle from that moment to now (Friday morning).  Satan keeps reminding me of my failure… whispering in my ear how stupid I am… how unworthy I am… and a host of other things.  I keep throwing Romans 8:1 at him.

Lesson/request: Learn from this little story.  Stay on your guard.  If you fail… repent and do all you can to make it right.  And “don’t let a root of bitterness spring up and defile many.”


4 comments on “When I Blew It!

  1. Peggy Holder says:

    I am so ashamed to admit that I relate to this. I thank you so much for this post and the reminder of the harm we do to others when we lose it.

  2. D.K. says:

    Great post brother. I can relate. I can’t count the times I’ve hurt the ones I love the most. Doesn’t take away your hurt I’m sure, but just know that you are not alone.

    Someone once said that “hurricanes only damage what’s in their path.” You and I both have close families who are always in our path. Remember that God has already forgiven and your family will too.

    Release it to God and He will comfort with His peace. This is my prayer for you.

    Love you all and hope all is well with you..

    • Pastor Ron says:

      Thanks “D.” It’s just that my sin is ever before me. I think one of the punishments for those in hell is remembering… all the hurt, pain, and destruction they caused in this life. Likewise, in heaven, the memory is of Jesus who bore our sin and carried it away “as far as the east is from the west.” I am just thankful for Romans 8:1! Miss you my brother. Blessings.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s